Update

Often on the internet, we share the best things we have going on in our lives but we never share the real issues and the difficulties we're experiencing in the real world. That’s part of the reason I created The Sick Life. Life is beautiful but it’s never perfect and we should never think that someone else has a flawless and glamorous life full of sunshine and rainbows because that’s what they choose to show us on social media. Life is also messy, and it can be tough sometimes.

Things have been very difficult for me, and my family, recently. I haven’t posted much because I didn’t want to pretend that things were going well. I’m not going to go into too much detail right now but my Dad hasn’t been doing well and it’s been really hard on all of us. He’s on the mend now, though, and things are slowly but surely getting back to normal. One of the hardest things in life is to watch a family member struggle. I was so afraid, for so long. I guess I still am because I know one day I’ll have to say goodbye and my heart already hurts so much thinking about that, but one day is not today and hopefully not tomorrow. He’s doing better now and I’m going to make the most out of the time we have now. All we can do is love, and love is what I’m doing.

As for me, I’ve also been struggling. I have never been in as much pain as I have been this last week. I’m still in it, unfortunately. Every day I expect to wake up feeling better but that hasn’t been the case as of yet. I’m very scared of becoming dependent so I try not to take them very often, even when the pain is severe, but I’ve been taking multiple pills every day. I’ve never experienced this amount of pain before and I hope I won’t have to again.

I was in the shower a few days ago and it struck me so hard all at once that I doubled over and had to curl up in a ball on the shower floor. I couldn’t move and I had to call my Mom for help. It just happened again only not in the shower this time. It’s been so constant for several days and I just don’t understand what it is. I think one of the most difficult things with chronic illness and pain is that I don’t know what pain means I should go to the hospital. I just don’t know what pains mean I should go and which ones mean I should just deal with it at home. You know what I mean? I’m always in pain, granted this one is worse than normal, but what do I do?

My Dad is getting better so hopefully, I will too. I'm hoping everything will be perfectly normal by this time next week.

Anyway, that's it for now. Have a great weekend!