Thursday, May 29, 2014
I'm sorry that I have (temporarily, hopefully) lost interest in this blog, but I have been posting on Facebook but I know that not all of you are on Facebook so I thought it would be a good time to write a little update post.
2014 has been a rough year so far. Things are really starting to look up though.
I hit rock bottom in regards to my Cymbalta withdrawal and have slowly but steadily crawling out of the hole that it left me in. I was doing some more research and I found that for some people it can take up to a year after quitting to get back to normal. There were some pretty dark days in my life since I last posted but it's getting better. I'm not back to the Kassie that I was before I went on the devil drug but I'm getting there.
I quit the rest of my medications too. All of them, with the exception of my rx folic acid (because one of the meds I was on, Methorexate, made my hair fall out and the folic acid is supposed to help so I'm not quitting it until my hair gets better) and vitamin D. I realized that I wasn't any better with the meds than I was before I started taking any so I would much rather be unwell and unmedicated than unwell and overmedicated. It seems like the right decision. When I posted that I quit all my meds on the BYDLS Facebook page I said I hadn't experienced any side effects or withdrawal but I lied. I have been in more pain and had a lot more swelling but it's nothing that I can't deal with.
I got approved for disability, which is such happy and amazing news. I know I've been disabled since 2009 and my friends and family know but it's nice to have that affirmation from the government, especially since they're notorious for being tough on people who apply. Does that even make any sense? It's just nice and reassuring. It's also a huge relief to be able to pitch in so my parents don't have to carry the financial burden alone. Money isn't everything but it sure is nice.
The final news I want to share is that my dog, Sebastian, died on the 10th of May. It's been incredibly difficult to deal with for my entire family, Cooper and Parker included. He was 15 years old and such a special and integral member of the family. He was only 5 weeks old when we made him part of our family in 1999. We all remember the day perfectly – we drove from Naples to Stuart (we lived in Florida at the time) and picked him out of the entire litter. He was the runt. He had been through so much in his life - being hit by a car, losing an eye, going blind in the other, and having lymphoma but none of that stopped him from being amazing. He was my little brother and I miss him deeply every single day. Obviously as time passes it gets easier to deal with loss but it hits me so hard every once in a while. I loved him very much.
That's really all I have to share at this time. Oh, wait. I bought a bed. That's big news. I've had the same bed since 1999 (also from Florida) and it was time for a new one. I have trouble sleeping but since sleep is so important to chronically ill people I decided to invest in one. All of the salespeople tried to talk me into getting at least a Queen but I sleep in a little tiny ball with a cat curled up in a little tiny ball on my feet so a Full is all I need. It cost $900! Does anyone else think that's totally nuts?!